I haven’t updated my blog for a while because I took a much needed break from the whole Infertility Saga as I seemed to be on a run of bad luck and it was stressing me out which in turn would only continue to contribute to the bad luck. Additionally, because of my PCOS and hormone problems I will always struggle with my weight and the battle to keep losing more in order to start IVF and then continue to keep it off during various treatments was turning me into a bad tempered, miserable person to be around and I knew it!! I didn’t want to treat myself or have a drink or nice meal to relax because I would pay for it by spending a full week dieting and exercising just to shift the lbs off that I had indulged in as a one off treat at the weekend – I just wasn’t worth it!
At my last hospital appointment they sent me home for being 0.5 over the BMI criteria even though I had lost nearly three stone, I had only put on a couple of lbs during the last treatment but this was still not good enough and I was sent home and told to contact them once I got the extra weight off. It devastated me, rather than go home and be fully motivated just to get the last couple of lbs off it felt like it was the straw that broke the camel’s back, i couldn’t do it anymore. Ironically I would be at the top of the IVF list only a few weeks later and you would think that I would just push through and keep up the strict diet and exercise regime till I got to the end goal but I couldn’t, I crumbled, I was exhausted with it all. Instead of feeling motivated and excited at the prospect of starting IVF I felt like it was becoming this pressure hanging over me all of the time – three years of constantly thinking about how much I want a baby but continually being knocked back by life – enough was enough – I needed my life back, I needed me back and so I put my foot on the break and stopped it all! I decided to focus on other things instead like going out and enjoying meals and wine and having what I wanted to eat without putting it into an app on my phone and of course planning my upcoming wedding. I have now put a stone of weight back on but I’m not going to lie, I have enjoyed every pound of it!
So, with some weight to lose and needing to get myself motivated I was mindful that I was becoming completely reliant on the fact that I had just accepted there was no hope of me doing this on my own without any medical intervention. My main issues is that I don’t ovulate (and obviously with no ovulation there will be no baby) I have results that show me that I have a really high egg reserve – so lots of eggs but just not parting with them. In an earlier blog I describe myself as a constipated chicken and this is always how I believed my body works, or doesn’t work more to the point! But, it has always seemed strange to me that this diagnosis of not ovulating has been based on only a handful of blood tests in the space of nearly four years and each of these blood tests have only ever been carried out on the requested date of day 21 of my cycle – which is equally bizarre as I don’t really have a normal cycle and only ever have a “normal” cycle if I have been given drugs to bring it on. But who am I to question this….they are the experts! As if Facebook could read my mind – just at a time where I was looking into more things I could do on my own to get some control back I stumbled across a PCOS support group and added myself into it. I had instant access to hundreds of women across the world going through very similar issues to myself who were supporting each other and sharing stories and I also had access to a variety of experts on nutrition and a product called Ovusense. The page is run by employees of Ovusense but you do not have to be a user of the product to be part of the page and to get help, support and advice. I found this really helpful and was finding out lots of different information about PCOS and how it affects the body and it was great to be able to speak to other women who experience the same things as you – you don’t feel so much like the odd one out when your own Facebook newsfeed starts to fill up with stories and questions that you yourself can connect with on a daily basis! The more stories I began to read from those who were using the Ovusense monitor the more I was intrigued about what this was and whether or not it would be worth trying. Many women on the page using it had been told, like me, that they don’t ovulate but have since found out that they do but just at different times from when doctors have requested them to have blood work done, additionally – women with PCOS can’t use home ovulation kits as one of the hormone issues we have can be picked up incorrectly using these so they aren’t reliable for PCOS women either. Like me, because they have PCOS, their hormones and cycles are all over the place so a one off blood test was missing the vital information but Ovusense had captured this information and in a lot of cases women had gone on to get bloods taken that showed that Ovusense had detected ovulation, in fact the product prides itself in being 99% accurate based on their studies. Not only that the company provides you with an option to pay it up in full or in monthly instalments which makes it affordable and if you use it for six months and find out you do not ovulate the company offers back a full refund as a good will gesture so that you can afford to try other options to help you have a baby. I thought…what do I have to lose here??? I took a leap of faith and bought one….I was excited at the prospect of having some control back because rather than relying on doctors telling me what my body was doing, I would be able to do it on my own to get a clearer picture of what was going on with my own body.
The day that my Ovusense arrived you would have thought it was Christmas morning – I couldn’t wait to get it opened and charged up so I could use it that night and get started on my new journey of taking back a little bit of control!! Ovusense comes in two parts – a sensor that basically looks like a large rubbery sperm – the head of which goes in internally when you go to bed and acts as an internal thermometer mapping information from your body all through the night – and the tail of which is your mode of removing the sensor in the morning before cleaning and placing on the second part – the monitor. The monitor downloads the information each morning and plots it on to a chart. The monitor has a section to place the sensor on and a screen which displays your information that you input at the beginning of each cycle and the chart that updates each day with the new information from the night before (which can also be compared with previous cycles) as well as a message at the top saying messages such as “ovulation not yet detected”, “You are in your fertile window”, “Ovulation detected on such and such a date” etc. basically a variety of messages based on the information downloaded from your body. All very technical but amazing, for once something personal to me that is listening and responding to my body! It’s very simple to use and I was desperate to go to bed just so I could use it! The first morning you put it back on the monitor is a bit of an anti-climax because all you see is one tiny wee dot on the graph as this is the first time you are charting your temp, so of course there is only going to be one wee dot! In your head you think you will place it on the monitor and you will end up with a nice full chart like you see other women posting on the support page, but you forget everyone’s had to start with one wee dot! Then you quickly go from a little disappointed about your wee dot – to proud of your wee dot and excited to see what it will look like tomorrow!
So, did I learn anything?? Has it been worth the money?? Absolutely!!
After using Ovusense for a few days I got a message to say that I was in my ovulation window – you could have blown me away, I wasn’t expecting to see this so soon. I asked other women on the support group if this seemed right and they said yes but I would still have to keep using it for a few more days to see if the monitor would confirm if ovulation did occur or not. I kept using it and sure enough, a couple of days later I got a message to confirm that I had in fact ovulated. I was in disbelief and even contacted some of the staff members on the support page privately to check if this was correct and they assured me that it was based on all my personal information downloaded from the sensor. Some women’s charts are all over the place as the women using it often have an array of different fertility issues but the perfect chart starts with a base temp, increases on the lead up to ovulation and continues to increase or remain above your base temp for anything up to 20 or so days after ovulation before slowly decreasing back to base temp to end your cycle. The temps staying up high for longer can be an indication of pregnancy and if not your temp will drop back down and you will get a period and the next cycle will begin thereafter. My chart nearly followed this perfectly – even dropping back down on day 19 and being my exact base temp on day 20! This is unbelievable and has amazed me! I can’t believe that I have been left to think that I don’t ever ovulate because 6 or so blood tests say so when in fact maybe it’s because the time was never taken to monitor me more closely to find out what my body is doing. However, now with Ovusense I have the chance to do that on my own! Not only that I started using a supplement recommended by the nutrition expert on the support page and did some research into it on my own and for the first time in a year I also took a period at the end of the cycle – in the space of a month my body is suddenly acting like it’s supposed to!!
I feel like I have control back – maybe, just maybe – with this new information I have about myself that I can continue to track, maybe I can have a baby the good old fashioned way???? I’m not expecting this to be the miracle I’ve been waiting for – I have started back on my diet and weight loss so that I can hopefully start IVF sometime this year if nothing happens, but for the first time in a long time I feel like I have some hope and some control back in this crappy situation. With the support from the PCOS group who have been fantastic, the Ovusense staff who answer all of your queries promptly at any time of the day and using the monitor I now have a chance to see exactly what my body is doing! This has been a complete game changer for me – maybe for once me and my body can start to work together instead of against each other!!
If anyone is interested in Ovusense the web link is below – I am also happy to answer any questions that I can! I do not work for them I am merely a new customer of their product – I am just one wee infertile girl from Scotland trying anything I can to make my dream of having a baby come true…….
2 infertility & beyond 